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COCKROACH INDIA STORE

Unofficial Satirical Parody Hub

PRIVACY POLICY (NO DATA SQUASH)

Form CJP-PRIVACY-2026: Constitutional Protection of Digital Slackers

Effective Date: May 22, 2026

1. The Anti-Squash Covenant

We promise never to squash your digital footprints. Unlike major tech cartels that auction your dreams to the highest bidder, the Cockroach Janta Party only collects minimal logs needed to verify your membership credentials and complete logistics dispatch coordinates.

2. Processing Operations & Deoband Food Compliance

Your payment coordinates are processed through industry-standard encryption. Financial logs and transaction receipts are managed under the regulatory compliance label: Deoband Food. Your banking statement will show charges marked under this name. This transparency prevents billing abandonment.

3. Cookies & Session Storage

We set a single, secure, `httpOnly`, `SameSite=Strict` token cookie on your browser. This cookie contains your encrypted session credentials and prevents malicious third-party scripts from intercepting your verified party status. We do not use tracking cookies because we are too lazy to analyze the data.

4. Erasure of Archives

If you decide to resign from the movement and request database erasure, we will delete your record from our MongoDB Atlas cluster immediately. Any physical paperwork will be tossed into our unorganized filing cabinet, where it will slowly decompose over centuries.

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